


Ask me

by female_overlord_3



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Emotional Hurt, F/M, M/M, Pain, Reveal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2020-01-05 04:53:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18359009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/female_overlord_3/pseuds/female_overlord_3
Summary: Michael returns Maria's necklace earlier.





	Ask me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AlxSteele](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlxSteele/gifts).



> Wtf is life guys. I have yet to sleep and just I deserve nice things and therapy again but I got this done..... It got super angsty and that emotional talk _hurt_ but it feels done (or a good place to end it.
> 
> Better tags will be added once I get my hands on my computer.
> 
> SHAY CHALLENGE FUCKING ACCEPTED I GIVE NO ABSOLUTE FUCKS RN. LOVE YOU 💖
> 
> NOT BETA'D JUST LET ME KNOW OK

All Alex wants is a drink and maybe some normality that the Wild Pony brings. He grabs a seat at the bar waiting for Maria to swing by and tell her how the trip to Texas went.

She comes not a minute after he’s seated with a shot of the good stuff ready for them both.

“Manes I made the biggest mistake of my life last night.”

Alex doesn’t think whoever she banged is that bad since she seems a bit lighter.

“Why don’t you tell me about how Texas went then you can lament all about your biggest mistake.” He throws back his shot and enjoys the slight burn that helps take his mind off of all the crazy stuff going on in his head.

Maria nods at the action and takes her too before pouring them another.

“Texas was a hack which sucked and lead me to said ‘biggest mistake’ because I can’t believe I really did what I did. I mean sure there’s always been a bit of tension between us and i’m not saying it wouldn’t have never happened, but still: why him.” She’s leaning against the bar with her elbows on the counter and dramatically covers her face with her hands. They both laugh when she peeks through them with a small smile.

“So DeLuca gonna tell me who ‘he’ is?” They knock their glasses together and down their shot. “Don’t keep me guessing.”

“Well alright it’s-”

She’s cut off when the doors swing open and Michael Geurin walks in shouting, “Hey DeLuca you forgot this. Did you put it in my boot on purpose because this thing is pointy and it hurt!”

Alex turns without a thought to see Michael dangling Maria’s necklace in his hands, who pauses when he sees Alex’s face before continuing to walk over.

Alex thinks he’s in shock but- no he’s felt that before. This is… something else. It’s not anger or hurt because he can’t be at either of them for- well being adults. It’s this weird mix of feelings he honestly doesn’t want to get into. Ever.

“Speak of the Devil. Thank you now leave and never return.” Maria snatches her necklace and tries to shoo Michael away but he just takes the empty seat next to Alex, still looking at him. Alex feels like it’s almost a challenge.

“Geurin.” He says first.

“Alex.”

Alex looks back at Maria who’s glaring at Michael until it turns into a frown. That’s a ‘i’m feeling something here’ frown and Alex doesn’t want to get into that either.

“Maria tells me you’re her biggest mistake.” He downs the new shot Maria poured them and tries not to look back at Michael but he can _feel_ his eyes still on him. Of course everything he was trying to ignore for just one night wants him to deal with it now. Typical.

“She wouldn’t be the first.”

Maria slides the bottle and their shot glasses out of Michaels reach. “Ya but I might be the last. I wasn’t lying about cutting things Guerin. Now leave.”

Michael finally just sighs in defeat and Alex can feel his gaze finally leave him but it's different this time, like it's final. That's what he wants right? To end this cycle they have of coming back to each other, ending up hurt, leaving then starting the whole thing over again. Right?

“Guess everybody wants to leave me.” He tosses a ten on the counter and stands to go but there’s something pushing at Alex to make him stay and not make this feel like it's actually ending.

“Wait Geurin-”

“You were right Manes, not a bang but a whimper. I’ll start making myself scarce.”

He should just let Michael walk. This time he isn’t the one walking away, this thing between them will finally end and it hurts but maybe-

“Michael Geurin you sit the fuck down now.” Maria hisses as she stares at Alex. He doesn’t even know what his face might look like right now but it’s probably telling her everything.

She slams the bottle down loud enough for everyone to hear and gets up on the counter. “Everyone who doesn’t want to be barred for life better leave in the next two minutes. Now.” Her eyes narrow at Michael who takes a step towards the rush of people leaving. “Geurin you stay or so help me I will end you.” she warns and Michael actually heeds the warning. He slowly makes his way back but sits with one stool between them.  

Hoping off the bar and quickly going to lock-up, she shouts a reminder for everyone to bring any taken glasses back tomorrow before shutting the door.

Maria crosses her arms as she leans back against the locked doors, eyeing the two men all the way at the bar counter. She gives her head a quick shake as she goes to turn the music off before slowly walking over.

“You.” She points at Alex. “Are an idiot but i’m thinking there’s way more to it than that.”

“You.” her hand swings to Michael. “Are still a mistake but a somewhat fun one.” There’s a pause as she ruminates before nodding. “ You’re also Museum Guy.”

Michael lifts a brow at that. “Museum guy?... Oh.”

“Dear lord I slept with Museum guy.”

She takes the seat between them and glares at Alex. “You made museum guy sleep with me!”

“That- I don’t even know what to say to that.” He argues.

“You told her about that.”

Alex reluctantly looks around Maria at Michael. He tries not to look too much into what he sees on Michael’s face.

“Sorta. Just the- the good parts.” Alex gets out. He really is tired. With what he knows now. What he wants to know. Everything he’s feeling. Just… Everything is started to be way more than he thinks he can handle and Alex Manes has handled so much shit.

So many emotions run through Michael’s face before it lands on his stupid go-lucky cowboy attitude. “Oh so you remember we had good parts now?” He gives Alex a sharp nod but his eyes are cold. “And here I thought I was the only one who did.”

Maria slams her hands on the table.

“Guerin stop being a dick and cut the act. I’m going to get you a glass, grab stuff that’ll make us regret drinking, and by the end of tonight we’re figuring out this thing between you two.”

It’s silent as Maria goes behind the bar while Alex tries his best to avoid looking at Michael and Michael only looks at him.

A shot glass is placed in-front of Michael and all glasses are filled with a brand new bottle of something with a fancy name that Alex can smell from his seat.

Michael and Maria down their drinks but Alex is hesitant, considering if drinking while dealing with whatever Maria thinks they need to deal with, is a good idea.

“Alex we are adults and we both know you won’t open up until you’ve had a bit of good old-fashion truth serum in you.” His glass is pushed closer.

He can still feel Michael’s eyes on him but it’s the worried look from Maria that makes him finally drink.

A satisfied grin replaces the worry and Maria leans against the bar eyeing them both.

“So Michael is Museum Guy. It took ten goddamn years for you to tell me and I had to figure it out. Michael and I had a simple easy hook-up last night cause life is shit. It meant nothing, Geurin don’t give me that look, sure it was good but we’re better off as friends, who else am I going to get annoyed with but who gets me? You two need to figure out whatever the hell your shit is right now because i’m starting to get a headache from this hopeful heartbreak thing you both got going on.” She finishes by pouring and draining another shot then hopping over the bar and moving to sit next to Alex, leaving the free seat between him and Michael. “Who’s going first?”

Alex watches as Michael eyes them both before pulling a bottle of nail polish remover out from his jacket and taking a couple gulps straight from it. The surprise from the action is the only thing that stopped Alex from launching across to slap the bottle away.

Michael lets out a long sigh with his eyes closed, looking so tired but ready to get whatever they’re doing over with.

“I’m so fucking tired of everything right now so i’m only saying this once: I’m an Alien.” His eyes bore into Alex, like he’s trying to find something but Alex doesn’t know what.

He’s not gonna lie though, finally hearing Michael say it makes all this alien drama he’s been dealing with so much easier. Alec can actually feel some of the chaos in his head quiet down while the tension in his whole body gives just a little bit.

“I’m not saying having sex with you was out of this world.”

Alex is blaming the alcohol on that even though he’s only had a few shots. He feels Maria shift closer and peer over his shoulder at Michael. “Prove it.”

He scoffs and shakes the nail polish remover like that should be enough but rolls his eyes as he focuses on the shot glasses on the bar until they start to float.

“Crash landed back in 47’ but I didn’t wake up until a century later.” The glasses start to spin in a lazy orbit until they settle gently back on the counter.

Alex didn’t know that part but he can easily piece together the other things. Michael and the Evan twins being found all those years ago. Max and Isobel being adopted. Michael in the system. All of them having to hide this secret for their whole lives.

Whatever tension and relief Alex had a second ago is gone, now replaced with horror. He pours himself another shot.

Alex knows what keeping secrets about yourself does and it being something so vital actually makes his chest hurt.

Maria reaches for the bottle to pour another drink. “Max and Isobel too then.”  

Michael stays quiet.

“Ok well I’m not dumb Guerin but i’ll let this slide. Alex?”

“Guess I made him go into shock.” Michael jokes as he pours a splash of nail polish remover into his glass then brings the bottle over to him to top it off.

Alex swallows down the emotions to keep his voice even. “Who else knows?” He finally asks. His dad brought Kyle in but Alex has a strong suspicion that Liz knows because anyone with eyes can see how her and Max are, and Roswell’s just small enough that there only a few people that would make sense.

“Besides you guys, Liz because she almost died and Max saved her, and Kyle cause Liz can’t keep her mouth shut apparently. I guess having a doc and bio-med researcher came in handy though.” There’s a deep frown on his face and Alex knows Michael still isn’t happy they know but begrudgingly grateful.

“Why tell us then?” _Why tell me_ he asks asks with his eyes. If anything he should have never told Alex, kept him in the dark so he could stay safe.

Michael’s eyes flick away as he turns to face the entrance and lean back against the counter, elbows resting on the wood to support him as his hands dangle over the side. Alex is torn between being grateful he can’t see Michael’s left but desperate to know the mark left on it is still there, the horrid reminder that what happened to them really did happen. That the good parts still happened.

“Guess I’m giving you the best excuse to finally walk away.” Michael has his head tilted up to stare at the ceiling for a moment before he looks back at Alex with a fake smile. “Then again it won’t really matter once I find the remaining pieces and leave. No one wants me to stay, might as well try and find out where i’m from.”

It feels as if pure ice shoots through Alex’s veins, leeching all the warmth leaving him frozen.

Michael leaving. The planet. Leaving to a place Alex won’t be able to follow. He remembers back when he thought Michael might leave after being told to move by the military and how panicked he felt that Michael was leaving to another state but now- now it’s like he can’t breathe, move, do _anything_ right now. Alex always left but some small part of him believed he could always get back to Michael no matter the distant or time it took.

“Pieces? Like for your Alien spaceship?”

Not even the reminder of Maria helps pull him out from where he feels stuck but then his brain gets stuck on the word pieces.

 _Pieces_.

Pieces of alien tech. A piece he has. A piece that could help Michael leave forever.

“Yup. It’s taken a few years, lots of digging and searching on the dark web as well as our good old town, but once I’ve gotten enough I can engineer what I have to so I can leave.”

Alex has just been staring at Michael saying nothing. Trying to read his face and decide what to say, say what he really wants to but he can see a sort of relief on Michael’s face, how it’s a bit more relaxed at the thought of leaving a place that’s been nothing but cruel and unforgiving his whole life.

A hand grabs onto his arm and he turns to see the conflict on Maria’s face reflecting his own about Michael leaving.

But Alex’s mind is stuck on Michael’s face and if he can make Michael feel better- if this is really what Michael needs, to be free and away to be happy, then Alex will help him.

“Michael you’d really- Alex, where are you going?”

Alex gently tugs his arm free and marches to the exit. He’s not thinking, doing anything _not_ to think about what he’s doing. Just keep walking. Unlock the door. Get to his car. Unlock it. Grab his bag. Give Michael the piece he needs to leave-

“Alex what are you doing?”

He tries to shake off the grip on his arm and get closer to his car but the hand only tightens.

“If you’re going to call me in at least give me ahead start Manes.”

Those words finally make him snap. That he thinks Alex would ever- but then he hasn’t really ever done anything to make Michael think otherwise, so all the anger turns to guilt and shame he can only blame himself for.

“Stop making this harder for me Guerin. Let me go so I grab the piece of your stupid ship and you can leave.”

Alex tries to pull away again but Michael’s other hand grabs onto him and brings him closer.

“What are you talking about.”

“Just let me-” He can feel tears of frustration starting to well up but he tries his best to blink them away.

“Alex hey calm down and talk to me-”

He finally pushes Michael away, his chest restricting even more at the hurt confusion that flashes across Michael’s face at his action. But this is all too much and he needs to do this before he can’t- before he losses whatever motivation he has to make Michael happy and be selfish by making him stay. Michael wants him to talk, he’ll talk, say his peace and give Michael what he needs to finally leave for good.

“You want to leave. You want to leave forever and you think nobody wants you to stay. You want to leave a place that’s been nothing but horrible and cruel, and I get that. If you really want to leave then I’ll help but if you stop me now I might-” He clamps his mouth shut and thanks the last few weeks of intense physical therapy that lets him whirl around to get to his car before Michael can stop him again.

He gets as far as unlocking it and a hand on the handle before he’s being turned and pushed back against the door by his shoulders.

“You might what.”

Acetone and alcohol wash against his face with Michael so close. His eyes fall to Michael’s mouth on instinct but he tries to wiggle the hand closest to the door handle with whatever higher brain functions he isn’t slowly losing with being nearly pressed up against Michael’s warm body.

A hand slides up to cups his neck, the contact of skin makes his breath stutter and his hand fall to his side.

“Alex.”

His eyes find Michael’s. Those eyes that never leave him. Those eyes that brings him back to probably the best and worst moments of his life. Those eyes he’s always looked into never saying what he really wants and only things that hurt them both.

“If you don’t let me go then i’m going to be selfish and find a way to make you stay.” He croaks out as his hands go to grip onto the lapels of Michaels Jacket.

“What if I want you to be selfish.” Both hands are cupping his neck now and makes his whole body melt into the hold, the unsaid trust that Michael will hold him up.

“What if I want you to make me stay.” A thumb brushes away a stray tear that falls then their foreheads are pressed together as they breathe the same air, enveloped in this moment. The cool night air up against Alex’s jeep in the empty lot of the Wild Pony with Alex wanting Michael to stay and Michael telling him he wants that too.

But… it can’t be that easy.

“But you’re not happy. You want to leave me.” Alex whispers trying to voice is worries. “What if I can’t- what if we- there’s always something that never just lets us be.”

His father. This town. The world. The damn universe always finds a way to keep them just out of reach.   

“I loved you and I know you loved me too. I still care about you but we don’t even really know each other. I only knew what I thought of you, what I learned from those few moments we had when we were younger and those few times we saw each other when I was on leave, but we’ve always just been physical! I want-” Alex’s right hand snakes its way up to press against Michael’s chest, right over his heart. “I want to know you. I want to- be friends again? Learn who you really are because what we had- the connections I felt was-” Alex tries to find the words but Michael easily voices them for him.

“Cosmic? So strong it’s lasted ten years?” Michael swallows and tries to calm down all his emotions bubbling up from everything Alex is saying, all the stuff he knew Alex was holding back. “Something that keeps hurting us. Something we couldn’t ever really have because I had to keep my secret since it wasn’t just mine.”

Alex shakes his head at that. “I already had my suspicions and knew about the Alien thing and I honestly don’t really care about that. God i’ve known for nearly a month Guerin but all finding out did was give me the chance to finally protect you.”

He looks up to see this shocked but soft look in Michael’s eyes, like amazement.

“I’m a skilled hacker. I’ve built connections in the government. I can help you go home and leave this planet if you really want that.”

“But you don’t want that.”

Alex’s jaw tightens.

“It doesn’t matter-”

“Of course it does!” Michael yells and Alex can feel his jeep starting to shake behind him before going still. “You just said you want to know me and be friends and you don’t _want_ me to leave.”  

His hand tightens in Alex’s hair and presses them closer together.

“I already said I wanted you to make me stay. The only thing keeping me here is my siblings and you. Sure I want to leave but so do a lot of other people. You’re not such a stranger to doing it.”

“Guerin-”

“All you ever had to do was ask me. That night you stayed when I didn’t even ask you to, was like a dream Alex. I woke up and you were there but then you left  still not wanting people to know. Then you came to me at the drive-in, which honest to god felt like a date, but you left and only came back to say things were over because I was a criminal.” There’s a desperation in his eyes, like he’s trying to get everything out before he crumbles under the pain. “I didn't think you'd be at the Wild Pony tonight but I'm glad you were because I finally got to tell you who I really was but then both you and Maria seemed to freak out that I was leaving even though not a couple minutes before you wanted me gone. So until someone actually asks me to stay, I honestly don't see why I should. Why stay if I'm not wanted.”

His eyes drop and so does his head, falling down to rest against Alex's chest, his shirt starting to get wet from tears.

“Why stay at all.” He croaks out as his arms slide down to loosely hold onto Alex's arms and take a shaky breath before starting to pull away.

“Stay.” The words are a whisper said into Michael's curls.

Alex's right hand fists Michael's shirt while his left wraps around Michael's waist to grip onto the bottom of it to stop Michael from pulling away.

“Stay here. With me.”

He pulls Michael flushed against him, the position uncomfortable but so close and perfect.

“I'm done running away.”

Alex's right hand trials up to snake his fingers in Michael's hair and gently tugs so he can look at him.

“I want you, so please, stay?” he pleads as more tears fall.

Michael stares at him with wet eyes in equal parts hope and fear.

“Don't ask if you don't mean it. There's only so many times I can hope Alex before I'm hollowed out.” His hands rising to hold Alex's face in them. “I need to know you mean it.”

Alex holds Michaels gaze with determination.

“Michael. I want you to stay.”


End file.
